Sunday, October 10, 2010

In Which I Assist in a Cover-up

When I first started college teaching back in 1969 0r 1970, I had an office in the second floor of a stadium, along with members of another department which shall be unnamed.

It happened that one member of that department, formerly an air force light colonel, provided himself with some means for Dutch courage against office hours and interminable meetings, and he would get neatly tipsy by late afternoon.

One afternoon, he availed himself of liquid consolation more so than usual, and was pretty hors de combat (nothing to do with camp followers, by the way).  Anyway, I was delegated to take him home; and I embarked on one of the less-often cited corporal works of mercy.  Strangely, the Bible failed to cite, "Blessed are those who carry those who had too much to drink home, for their's is an additional fortifying tote."

So, I did, I helped the Colonel to the car with some assistance from one of his colleagues and took him home.  He indicated that he had a pressing engagement.  I didn't know he did laundry.

At this house I rang the bell after assisting him to the door.  His wife answered, and gave me total holy hell for leading him astray!  Yes, like I spent the afternoon getting pied with him!

I only later learned how to handle that sort of eventuality when I first viewed Animal House a few years later:  You leave the person there, ring the doorbell, and run like hell!

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