Monday, August 27, 2012

Football Predictions, Week One

Well, it's that time again.  Football season is upon us.  Here's my predictions for this week, for what they're worth:

South Carolina Gamecocks 37  Vanderbilt Commodores 7
Texas A & M 35  Louisiana Tech 14
North Carolina State Wolfpack 24  Tennessee Volunteers 14
Georgia Bulldogs 38  Buffalo Bulls 7
LSU Tigers 49  North Texas State Mean Green 10
Auburn Tigers 26  Clemson Tigers 20
Arkansas Razorbacks 35  Jacksonville State Gamecocks 14
Mississippi Rebels 25 Central Arkansas Bears 20
Florida Gators 33  Bowling Green Falcons 7
Mississippi State Bulldogs 38 Jackson State Tigers 18
Missouri Tigers 29  Southeastern Louisiana Lions 10
Alabama Crimson Tide 33  Michigan Wolverines 20
Kentucky Wildcats 24  Louisville Cardinals 16
North Alabama 44  Miles College 7

The Game of the Week

Mismatched Games against weak opponents

I look for the SEC Championship game to be between Alabama and South Carolina.

Sunday, August 26, 2012

Duck Tape Amazement

While I was in a Target the other day, I spied several different kinds and colors of Duck Tape on display.  Using the 10 yard size as a standard, I found the following:

Old-fashioned silver duct tape       $3.37
Other colors                                          $3.37
Hello Kitty duct tape                          $6.00
Monkey duct tape                                $6.00
UT (Tennessee) duct tape                $6.67

Now duct tape, and Duck brand duct tape, is a good, useful product, and I use it.  As a self-respecting Southerner, but maybe not the conventional kind, I also use WD-40.  But I find it amazing that people would repair something with duct tape carrying their preferred school's logo.  And pay more than DOUBLE the base rate price to do so. 

Can there be a clearer example of tacky fandom gone wild?

And I got that sinking feeling:  Is there Auburn or Alabama duct tape out there?  Do we have fans out there in the Yellowhammer State as demented as those people who voluntarily tog out in Dreamsicle orange each Fall?

The horror!  The horror!  We do.  As a matter of fact, most of the SEC is represented.

A consolation.  UNA is not represented.  I don't know whether this is due to latent good taste despite the D1 aspirations, or the duct tape people simply overlooking it.  Even at my age, I need my delusions!

Monday, August 13, 2012

Sometimes Acronyms Can Be Misunderstood -- or Not

An example of this came in the case of an overheard communication by a hospital worker.

It was during a procedure where the hall of a hospital had to be cleared.  The worker said, "Get the COW out of the hall."

He was berated for hs nonprofesional behavior, calling a patient 'a cow.'

His response was: "Cow.  C-O-W.  Computer on Wheels."

I wondere how he could have handled 'Nine F-er?"

[A Nine F-er is a fat, fortyish, flatulent, fecund female with foul foaming floating feces.]